Ronnie: Honky wanted a fistful of my balls!

Wheeler: I don't have crabs! What have you been telling these kids?

Ronnie: That you have crabs.

Danny: I bet if I suggested a game of Quidditch he'd cum in his pants.

Gayle Sweeny: Me and the judge have a special relationship... I don't wanna get too graphic but I sucked his dick for drugs.

Schoolboy: Hey nice cow outfit. Where can I pick one of those up at, the gay zoo? Homo.

Danny: No, no. It's not a cow. It's a a minotaur. It's a creature of myth. And he got this one out of your mom's closet.

Wheeler: She let me keep it after I fucked her.

Danny: Can I get a large black coffee?

Barista: A what?

Danny: Large black coffee.

Barista: Do you mean a venti?

Danny: No, I mean a large.

Barista: Venti is large.

Danny: No venti is twenty. Large is large. In fact tall is large and grande is spanish for large. Venti is the only one that doesn't mean large. It's also the only one that's Italian. Congratulations, you're stupid in three languages.

Barista: A venti is a large coffee.

Danny: Really says who: Fellini? Do you accept Lira, or is it all Euros now?

Ronnie: Suck it, "Reindeer Games"!

Danny: I'm not Ben Affleck.

Ronnie: You white, then you Ben Affleck.

Wheeler: You *are* white.

Danny: That's true, I am white.

Wheeler: What up, Ronnie?

Ronnie: I don't wanna take my pants off!

Wheeler: What?