Saul: BF... FF?

Dale Denton: Best Fuckin’ Friends Forever, man!

Dale Denton: What the fuck's in there, a rancor!?

Saul: Start the car man, start the car!

Dale Denton: Yea, you see, me doing that and you saying it is obviously helping.

Saul: Well start it!

Dale Denton: I can't...the batteries are must be dead.

Saul: What do you mean the batteries are dead?

Dale Denton: The batteries are dead...I don't know any other way to possibly explain this to you.

Dale Denton: Yeah but if you do bad stuff you're going to come back as something bad like a slug or an anal bead. But if you do something heroic then you'll come back as like an eagle or a dragon, or Jude Law. Now which would you rather be?

Red: The anal bead wouldn't be bad. I mean I guess it would depend on whose anal bead it was.

Dale Denton: It's *my* anal bead.

Robert: Angie, you're an idiot. I say that with love.

Angie Anderson: Fuck you Dale. I lost my virginity when I was fourteen, okay? How many women have you even slept with?

Dale Denton: Like two and a half.

Angie Anderson: Two and a half? What the fuck does that mean? Your hand?

Ken: Prepare to suck the cock of karma!

Ted Jones: Has anyone seen my bigger knife?

Saul: Hey look, my thumb looks like my cock.