Otis B. Driftwood: That's what they all say "Fuck you", well it ain't gonna save you. It don't scare me none and it don't suddenly make you a fucking hero.
Phil Philips: I never knocked a guy out with his own balls before. (00:26:05)
Birdie: Check this out. You ain't goin to college or any fuckin where if the Bird Man don't win. You might be on the other team, but you playin for ME. Remember that.
Left Ear: We're in Italy. Speak English.
Sergeant Howie: What religion can they possibly be learning jumping over bonfires?
Lord Summerisle: Parthenogenesis.
Sergeant Howie: What?
Lord Summerisle: Literally, as Miss Rose would doubtless say in her assiduous way, reproduction without sexual union.
Sergeant Howie: Oh, what is all this? I mean, you've got fake biology, fake religion... Sir, have these children never heard of Jesus?
Lord Summerisle: Himself the son of a virgin, impregnated, I believe, by a ghost.
Scout: Hey, Miss Dubose.
Miss Dubose: Don't you say hey to me, you ugly girl!
Richard Brewer: Lord, forgive us for our wrongdoings, for our misguidance by heathen religions. Thank you for keeping us alive. Lord, be with us in doing the right thing. Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallow be thy name.
William H. Bonney: Please, Dick. It's getting cold. (he and Dick both pull guns on each other) I could've killed you, Dick. I could've killed you, but I don't want to kill you. I want to eat.
Slick: I wanna shoot someone y'kno and this feels like just the gun to do it with.
Lonnie Laloush: Walk faster Finger Blaster.
Hoffman: You wanna know the only thing that's wrong with killing you, Jill? I can only do it once.
Nicky Santoro: We're supposed to be robbin' this place, you dumb fuckin' Hebe.
Rudy Baylor: Sworn in by a fool and vouched for by a scoundrel. I'm a lawyer at last.
Louis Booker: Don't worry, Charlie. We'll get the money back, all right? He can't go far.
Charlie Carbone: It's a continent, Louis. He can go very far.
Louis Booker: I know it's a continent. I read the book.
Charlie Carbone: Did you happen to read the chapter on not putting your jacket on a wild animal?
Louis Booker: No, but I did read the chapter on how an aborigine can kill a white man with a twig. Do you want to see that one?
Dalton Russell: Fact is, all lies, all evil deeds, they stink. You can cover them up for a while, but they don't go away.
Frank Serpico: You know what they say, don't you? If you love a man's garden, you gotta love the man.
Marion Cobretti: You're a disease, and I'm the cure.
Sydney Prosser: You're nothing to me, until you're everything.
Mac: Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive. But practice makes perfect.
Ozunu: Weakness compels strength. Betrayal begets blood. This is the law of the Nine Clans.
